Time heals all wounds as per the old legend/proverb/saying/myth says and I am reduced to say, “Hell yeah. Sayonara, sucker!”
It’s been a year since my break-up. [You heard it right. Break-up. And I think I can state it clear here that I used to be one biter-ass-bitch because years after writing with wishful thinking and blind imagination about love and the pains that comes with it, I can finally write with real experiences in check. ] If you had been reading all my entries here, it would not be so hard to surmise how lovesick and heartbroken I was. The world was a difficult prick to me. Everything nice became everything dull and all things awesome became… Huh. I don’t know.
“All forces of the universe connived to make me the saddest little college girl in the world.” At least, that’s how things were in my head. I hardly hung out with my best buddies for a semester due to schedule differences. The first three months of the fall was all about “me, my ex and my ex’s new girl trying to be friends.” I spent my birthday wallowing in misery with my bestfriends; I didn’t even know I was actually depressed. And there went a month of two-way commute with “The Last Five Years” on loop.
Until I finally learned to keep my priorities in check. Until I decided to devote my time in the arts. Until I found myself determined to move on and make new memories so much awesomer than how I first wanted things to be.
Young adults like us when trapped in sudden realizations in the middle of college, would just hit us and go, “Damn. This is so not how I pictured things to be.” And then one by one, we’d find ourselves rehashing every single hope and dream we’ve carved in our very hearts. In time, as we get over the fact that we have lost time in trying too hard to have fun and be reckless and be young, wild and free… we rebuild our hearts. We find new dreams. Dreams that are sure to come true. Dreams with game-plans, instructions and all that is in between.
By then, we just notice that we’re flying again. Slowly but surely, we get to touch and feel the clouds drifting against our cheeks and everything would just feel unreal. All the while we feel uneasy and insecure for anything that might cut off our wings and lead to another letdown.
But this makes us strong and invincible at the end of the day: all the battle scars and broken bones. But you know what? It’s been a year and I’m in a much better place now. I guess, that’s all that matters.