The Place To Be

The Place To Be

Oh, what I’d do
Just to drag the moon back
Up in the horizon
Hung alongside the stars
And be submerged
In the depths of the night
Drifting across the sky
Waving my belly
Kicking and jerking through it
Fly for a bit
Whip my hair
Over and over
Not caring at allSo long as everyone is
Blinded by the dark
Gallop my feet
Beat and feel
Percussion of the universe
Indifferent to everyone else
Confused and lost
Indeed, they seem
As I keep losing myself
In the magnificense
The crappy
The wild
Is where I want to be

The Still Day

The Still Day

The still day passed
As curtains fell
Concealed the centerstage
Seemingly wanting
To keep spectators out
There was nothing
Nothing to see
Nothing to watch
To gossip or talk about
The hall should’ve been
Kept empty and quiet
For me to clean it up
I never understood
Why you had to
Or why you were kind
To stay and keep company
To take a trip
To the backstage
And see the magic
Within the very hall
But why; How even?
Who are you
To be allowed
To see every inch and cranny
Every crack and glitter
The horribly etched details
Of the very hall
That is me
Why did I allow you
To even see me
Do I kick you out?
Do I push you away
I’ll never know
And I will never know
’til you ask me to let you stay
Or profess you love
To an ever still day

Sweetheart; walking away

Sweetheart; walking away

Sweetheart, you can walk away
There weren’t chains binding you
No lingering shackles to hold you back
No oak has poisoned you into this
Not even potions to enchant you
You are no elastic band to go
Then come springing back to me
I am a nobody; nothing to you
As much as I am; no nothing
You don’t even need to clear that up
The windshield is crystal clear
There aren’t much dust in the road
Sweetheart, I will be fine
You can freely go
I did not even take your hand
I held it when I could
But never gripped and did not give in
My heart was not really yours either
I gave you chance to take hold
I knew then that I was bold
Strong enough to let you borrow my heart
And sweetheart it’s okay
It’s okay for me to not be okay
And watch you walk away
For you were not branded to stay
As I am just another day

Minutes away from bedtime

Minutes away from bedtime

I’m only minutes away from bedtime. I’m quite confused what to write about really. But I would like to share that I am listening to “Say Something” by A Great Big World featuring Christina Aguilera. On loop.

And it’s actually…sad.

I’m minutes away from bedtime and I’m actually shoving sad melodies in my head. Choking my mind with my past heartbreak. I feel my heart weeping and all at once trying to keep up with what should be felt. I know for sure that my heart is trying its best to maintain a serene and calm posture. And it is struggling.

I’m minutes away from bedtime and I’m dragging myself down.

I’m minutes away from bedtime and I haven’t finished either of my homeworks. Well, I’m unsure of the other. I haven’t even prepared what I’m going to wear for tomorrow’s school day. The electric fan keeps blowing and it feels like it’s reminding me of things I must keep in mind for the rest of the week. I’ve books to read and other things to think about. That couple of latter things I’m sure of but still it’s quite…unclear.

I’m minutes away from bedtime and I hunger for the feeling of being so special. Just like I once felt even when it was nothing but foolishness. I can’t believe I am this honest to admit that I feel desperate. I don’t know. Who doesn’t want to feel that way? Loved. Wanted. Special.

I’m minutes away from bedtime and I’m singing the very same song to myself.

“Say something I’m giving up on you”

‘Don’t kid yourself,’ I say. ‘You’re not one who would give up. You don’t give a fuck about giving up.’

I’m minutes away from bed— It’s bedtime.

 

Grayscale Rainbow

Grayscale Rainbow

Rainbow shatters
Into a million pieces
Ashes scatter
To the endless rivers
Particles and particles
All fade; disappear
Into the darkness
I say, “stay” —NO

Neglect, reject
All hopes, eject
Not any more
All that was bright
False joy and delight
Even that one day
One day I believed you
I believed in you

Your monochrome
Was ever lovely
In my eyes
The colorless
Was magnificent
Grayscale rainbow
Seemed beautiful

And the beautiful
Shattered
Just as my heart
Faltered
Right when your love
Altered
Goodbye, yesterday
You mattered.