You and I both shall stand again

You and I both shall stand again

I got my heart punched in the ass without you knowing every little detail. I doubt that you know a single thing about it really. You never saw his face. You never saw us. I guess it is better that way. At least, I won’t hear no shit about how I lost or how I was defeated by some douchebag you don’t even give a fuck about. Either way, I am quite sure I won’t hear no shit about it.

When your got your shin broken, I got my heart broken too. You got hospitalized. You were taken care of. People visited you. They showed up and granted you the support that would feed your spirit to get better as soon as possible. Oh, lucky, lucky you~

And then there was me.

Gee. I had to put up my own rehabilitation scheme. I used spiritual methods. I did my best to meet my friends. It was me reaching out. I was broke while I was at it. I’d wake up in the morning minding how I’ll manage doing chores and getting back to the hospital in time for lunch. And then when I get there, I’ll wallow in misery trying to get a hold of myself. For all you knew, all of you… You thought I was okay even when I was genuinely not okay. Of course, I couldn’t risk unleashing my un-okay-ness. I know well my cheek would sting even before I could even see Mom slap me. So yeah.

It has been a month since you and I got each other broken. Oh well. I believe we’re both coping quite good enough? You’ve been eating more now. I’ve been schooling again. We’re both doing stuff to get by just as we should. And it is the right thing to do.

As it is the right thing to do, one day we’ll both see the very concrete purpose of this thing happening to us. I don’t even know. I haven’t the slightest idea. Not even for myself. But indeed, I can only hope for the best.

As much as I hate you, or as much as we both hate each other… You should know that I am glad to see you walk again. I know I don’t have to involve myself in you doing so because, well… I know you are strong enough to handle that on your own. You’re awesome. But I am happy.

I can’t really ask you to be happy for me too with regards to my own endeavors but yeah I can vouch to you that I’ll kick ass on my end. I know I will. I’m well aware that people are counting on us and that we’re both freakishly brave to immerse in any of the stuff that we do.

You and I shall stand again. Both of us. One day, I’ll see you doing another aerial, stunts of which I can only do in my sleep. One day, I’ll genuinely be awesome-r and back with cake! We’ll be better. Both of us. I can’t really claim nor promise that we’ll get along as best butties but I know for sure that you and I both shall stand again. Stronger. Braver. Bolder.


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